Sunday, February 24, 2008

THE MAGIC KEYSTONE

Aboard a glorious escapade(hiihii)here I am with my second act of fiction for my blog;this is a dedication to all who are young at heart or wish to be so :) and to an ageless wonder who's frequenting my dreams recently..love u dida!


Once upon a time in a place quite close to your bedroom window, there lived a romance. Everyone who met her agreed that she was one of the prettiest romances there could be. She had a beautiful princess, a handsome prince, a wonderful castle,high towers, friendly dragons, wicked witches, sparkling rivers with pretty silver fishes and lots of feasts and carnivals. But most importantly, she had the most amazing key that was ever dreamt about.It was a small golden key that unlocked precious old memories, and was hidden in the tummy of a special fish in the sparkling river.

Rishabh lay quietly, staring at the darkness outside his bedroom window,tremulous.It felt odd,like he was being wary of something.It could have been the demons in Dida's story.Dida. Why did they have to.....He tried very hard to understand why grown up people did these things,but he never could. And Bholu was no help, wagging his tail and licking his face when Rishabh really wanted him to sit quietly and work out why Dadu and Didu would be angry with Mummy because Daddy went away. Actually-Rishabh pulled his soft blanket tighter around him– these days Dadu and Dida always seemed angry for all the wrong reasons. They scolded Mummy for the really cool things she did for him,like giving him a key to the house and letting him come home in the school bus with his friends-he was soo happy the day mummy had given him the permission.He wondered why letting him have sandwiches for lunch (on the promise of eating his dal and vegetables "with no fuss" at dinner) on the three days Purnimadi did not come to their house would cause any problem.Rishabh had even tried to tell Dida not to scold Mummy so much because he liked being alone in the afternoons and that the ayah he had used to lock him in his bedroom and bring the tall rickshaw-wallah in to
watch TV.But Dida had spoken to Dadu and there was a big fight that evening. Dadu refused to speak to Mummy, but Dida scolded Mummy for 'poisoning the child’s mind' against them.Rishabh knew Mummy would cry after that, so he went into the bathroom and opened the taps and tried to read the comics he kept behind the cistern. After that day, Dadu-Didu stopped coming. Mummy stopped taking him to meet them and Bholu. And the romances stopped coming to see him at night. For a year now, Rishabh looked at the tiny stars in the square darkness in his window till he fell asleep.

She was a lovely romance,everyone said,and brave and intelligent,but would she be able to find him in time? She had till next Thursday,when he would turn eleven.If she didn’t find him by then he would stop believing in princesses in towers,in dragons who flew you to the rainbow and back,in silver fishes with golden keys in their round tummies; and then, asked everyone, what would happen to the stories?Romance was not frightened in the least.Well, just a little bit. But the secret name of the fish with the key in its tummy was Pheonix,and so she knew she would find the boy before he turned eleven.

Rishabh liked the white haired granny who had come to live in the flat next to theirs. Mummy and aunty from downstairs had been whispering about how sad it was to have to live alone at her age with none of her children nearby, but Mummy suddenly changed the topic to his schoolwork.Rishabh knew aunty would speak about Pooja’s homework,quickly swallow her cooling tea and go away.This is what happened when any of the aunties spoke about the granny living alone and being sad about her children and grandchildren in faraway places.The granny never seemed sad though.
Rishabh knew,because although he had not told Mummy (Mummy was always so tired these days,office and going away to meet lawyer uncle,Poornimadi’s holiday and his homework. He didn’t want her to worry any more) he had been spending his afternoons with the granny. It started when the current went suddenly one evening while Mummy was at
lawyer uncle’s and Rishabh had insisted on staying alone in the house. He hated the smell of old books in lawyer uncle’s office. Besides it was the evening Daddy usually called.He was sitting in front of the television trying to understand a serial Dida used to watch when suddenly everything went dark. Rishabh froze.It felt like the square of darkness outside his window had suddenly found a way into his home.Just then, someone knocked on their door. Thinking it was Mummy,Rishabh lunged at the door and tried
to open it,but he couldn’t see the key in the dark.When he finally opened the door it wasn’t Mummy, but the new granny. "Rishabh, shona… are you scared?" "And Rishabh threw his arms around her soft plump waist. "Yes," he sobbed, "yes". The electricity came back in a few minutes, but Rishabh
stayed with the granny for a whole hour. "I already have a Dida," he informed her. "So call me Didu", smiled the granny. "No," said Rishabh, scrunching his nose. "It’s the same thing.I shall call you Granny,like people do in books. Okay?" The granny laughed and laughed, but she said
okay.That was how Rishabh came to spend his afternoons with Granny.

Tuesday morning was mild and breezy when Rishabh swung himself into a seat by the window in his school bus. By the time there was only Sid left to pick up, though, the breeze grew stronger and dark clouds started rolling in. When they reached school ten minutes later rain was pouring down in sheets and the morning looked like evening. The durwan ran out to speak to the driver, waving his hands over his head. "No iskool, no iskool", he
shouted at the cheering boys, before running back into his tiny room beside the school gate.Rishabh loved the rainy days and the splurge that came with it.He was back home and completely drenched by ten in the morning. He and Pooja had been playing in the rain till her mother spotted them. Running up the stairs, he pounded on Granny’s door instead
of unlocking his own. "story! story!" he cried as he bounded in when she opened the door. Stories were how the two of them spent most of their afternoons. Granny tried to capture him inside a dry fluffy towel, tut-tutting at what she called his ‘badrami'. 'monkeyness’.

The thunder rolled outside. In the cool shadow behind Granny’s spice and pickle jars, Romance grinned to herself and whispered with Pheonix.

Rishabh’s mother sat clutching her head while his Dida stroked her hair.His Dadu was on the phone with one Sid’s mother. Sid was home.Yes, school had been cancelled. No,Rishabh had gone home.He was not at any of his friend’s places.Yes, please let her know when he was found, she was so worried about the poor child. "Let’s go back to your place, ma," Rishabh’s Dida said softly to her daughter. "Maybe he’s asleep, maybe he could not hear the phone ringing in this thunder…" "The poor boy is probably terrified, left alone in this thunderstorm…" began his Dadu, but his Dida silenced him with A Look."Rishabh loves thunderstorms" his mother sniffed."Such scoldings he would get from his father about playing in
the rain…" "Just like you used to”, his Dida said, smiling a little at the memory. "Let’s go to your place, he’s probably playing with a neighbours child, there’s no reason to be scared. Come on." She gently guided her daughter out of the room.

"…and when the prince showed them the golden key, the King
and Queen remembered how much they loved their beautiful
princess and went with the prince to rescue her from the
tower the wicked witch had locked her in… Rishabh! Rishabh?"
But Rishabh was fast asleep after a morning’s splashing about
in the rain and the hot bath and lunch Granny had forced
him to take. Granny covered him with a thin blanket and
tiptoed out of the room, missing the smile that settled on
his face as the beautiful, beautiful story settled in his
heart.

happy ending,whatsay? ;)

Friday, February 22, 2008

THE LOONEY LASS-VOL 1



She pampered my heart and
She touched my soul

Swept me off and promised

To shower me with more


She tasted blue blood and

She rekindled my fear

Made me happy,

She made me her own


I complained on and

I spurted it out

She took sip after sip
I gave her some more

The looney lass in red,she’d call herself

Her drunken wings would catch the wind ,
And try
Learning to fly
Of the monsoon drizzle, she’d quench her thirst
And she had a good mind to change the world!

She had the eyes of

The most prudent owl

And how I wish
I could
Kiss them now

She rode the times

Like a crazy hog

She had a halo
And
Medusa’s curls

She still haunts and

She still does fondle
She takes me to hell
By a heavenly path

The looney lass in red, she’d call herself
Her drunken wings would catch the wind ,
And try
Learning to fly
Of the monsoon drizzle, she’d quench her thirst
And she had a good mind to change the world!

Monday, February 18, 2008

A 'SCAR'ED HEART

Today was real boring.Hence the desire to do something amusing.Doing a tag seemed a cool option.As I cant see anybody tagging me in near future, I tag myself.so here goes....


1. Pick out a scar you have , and explain how you got it .

Yikes!scar!pain!not again. :( well, i am not into vandalism and have not taken any public beating except in RP. sighs!After a prolonged examination of the wonderland(haha) that is my body, I proclaim that I have only one scar(on the palm of my left hand) which i got while I,semiconscious,jumped from a 12-ft wall while holding on to the barbed wires atop it.Was this crazy Raghu?(mtv wala)The confounded wires refused to let go before making a subastantial impression.Hence the bloodpool.And stiches.and the scar.remember missing mommy then. :)

2. What does your phone look like ?

tadaaaaaaaa!!!!My phone looks like..umm..why like any other phone! If I have surprised you,it has a keypad and a screen too !And it is as black as a buffalo.Whatt a revelation!!ishmaart answer :)

3.What is on the walls of your bedroom ?

This reminds me of the Tehelka probe.Sting operations.:) but i will do the khulasa cuz there isn't much to hide,really!i live in a hostel with a roommate who can be described as the male version of a sanskari bharatiya nari.:D he projects himself that way.Now don't you get kinky!!The walls.White.Lots of dampness.A poster of Julia Roberts in her prime and another with half a dozen adages.Both of which are abandoned properties of seniors.Else,nothingness.

4. What is your current desktop picture ?

I use Webshots desktop sw.Where you get to assemble plenty of wallpapers.The wallpaper changes every 15 mins.Mine is a collection of sunsets,waterfalls,gardens,actors n actresses and couple of pics of sweetheart which i sneaked from someplace.hehe.Currently she is smiling at me looking ever so cute.hi sweetie!!

5. Do you believe in gay marriage ?

This be a tangent.Gay marriages happen.So I cant see the utility of this question. I believe a marriage is a union of two minds,who then commit to tread the path of life together. The essence of a marriage is unaffected by trivial issues.gay or otherwise.

6. What do you want more than anything right now ?

I want peace.I want to be ridden of all worldly problems.
And I want quality food.I want to look into a crystal ball and read people's minds.Realistically I want to go see Jodha Akbar.

7 . What time were you born ?

On a warm,mundane afternoon that fateful,auspicious day(akshay tritiya) in April , 1987 , I was delivered into this world ,with plenty of indication of the fact that I was to grow up to become the charming young bloke I am today. :P A few minutes after I was born ,a pretty nurse wrapped me in a soft white blanket and brought me to maa. As she looked at me with those eager eyes, I gripped her finger with my tiny palm ,and squeaked in my newly discovered voice - "ma ma bolona kota bajee?."

hihi..i think u discern the fact that the last part couldn't have happened.and that i wouldn't remember.
Bottomline-I do not know.


8. Are your parents still together ?

had hai yaar!!This is India;parents remain together.They are very much together and touchwood theyhave no dangerous plans.fevicol ka mazboot jod hain, tootega nahi.okk,this was a pj.

9. Last person who made you cry ?

Ishaan Awasti.Or was it myself?TZP was real touching though.And it should make it to the oscars.For many reasons.And cuz it made me cry.

10. What is your favorite perfume / cologne ?

As i answer this,for once it feels like being a celebrity.Once upon a time i used to like BRUT MUSK.Switched to AXE two yrs back.Inspired by the commercial.But girls fail to notice the AXE effect it seems.poor me.Hey,I'm kidding k?

11. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex ?

Well,i feel beauty and blonde hair don't go together.Meg Ryan being the exception.Any kind of hair color is snobbish.Black rules.As for eyes,i like brown and black.On second thoughts,any color.as long they are expressive and are looking into mine,and not wondering idhar-udhar!

12. What are you listening to ?

Another brick in the wall by Pink Floyd.It's worth mentioning that I would hate to be one.I would rather fall off.

13. Do you get scared of the dark ?

nope.so long as one Rakhee Sawant's not popping out of the darkness.:) actually i feel stimulated in darkness.

14. Do you like pain killers ?

Now now this is downright insane.It's a remedy,a medicine.There's no like or dislike here stupid! If there is pain, I take the pill.Don't think I'm expected to 'like' pain killers and yell "Maaa !feel like having something really special today.Please make me biriyani and painkillers for dinner!" :P

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out ?

Ummmmm...no.I'm pretty forthright.It's another matter that some people are in love with the word 'no' forever. :(

16 . If you could eat anything right now , what would it be ?

Some vulnerable hotshot's bheja..with some chilly achar.And mom-made biriyani.Told you.I love it.

17.Who was the last person you made mad ?

Mommy.I do this with alarming frequency.

18. Is anyone in love with you ?

s***!!it seems the person who made this tag is a masochist.obsessed with pain.Me,however, having started my first tag with pain would give anything to end it on a different note,on a high.So my answer is yes. :)

This tag was fun.I have made it elaborate.yahooo!I would love to meet the person who designed this tag.I really enjoyed doing it;laughing at my own jokes.I pledge to keep my spirits up in foreseeable future.And do more tags. It's worth it. :)

Friday, February 15, 2008

DIL CHAHTA HAI


"Why are you sounding soo philosophical ?", my friend asked me. She was referring to my incoherent,boorish comments on life on what was supposed to be a emotionally arousing occasion filled with mush and musings.
"come on bhondu it's v-day; and u aint really be a vagabond when it comes to....haha!!!"
"tell me does v refer to victory? for me? or for st.valentine??"
"whattt??"
"they keep telling me that love's in the air.Why don't i feel it?"
"are you mad?"
"my mom thinks so.then i must be na?? all i infer at this moment is an all-encompassing truth..which robs me of all my vitality..have u ever felt blessed and cursed at the same time??"
"damn u...u and your pet peeves.cant u say something comprehendible?or whatever!!what now?and you claim to be an eternal optimist.my foot."
"but really dearie, quixotic and chivalrous that i am, i'm still the devil's assistant!you know that."
"ya ya and i'm devil incarnate!nerdo!
"gosh..that's exactly what i meant!"
"go to hell!!bye."

hunh!!Back to my reverie..having successfully pissed off a benevolent soul, which I so often drive to sheer insanity. Thank God for small mercies!! As a friend put it,there are some moments in life when your mind feels like the inside of a saree store full of bengali mashimas during the annual discount season . There are some moments in life when you wish your leg was flexible enough to curve back and land a sunny deol-ish kick on your own behind bad enough to render your morning rituals ineffective for three months .Ok people i'm only trying to feel better.darn!
Desperate dejection can be pretty trying at times....I remember reading an article written by Albert Camus and wondering how to tread the narrow line between destiny and choice. But is there really any difference? Have I not been gullible all the while? May have been people.Or providence.Certainly not by choice. A quick flashback. Damn!!Fast forward.Better..well it was choice more often than not.And responsibility.And naivety. But crucially no repugnance, no repentance. A desire to exercise more than a semblance of control in some cases..nothing more.
Here, i have a funny recollection.Ten days prior to my 12th boards,the family astrologer read my palm and with a straight face exclaimed that I had a none too bright future;at most,In all probability I would complete my honors and my profession will be that of a cane-wielding maths teacher.Queer.That irked me.And my parents.But it sure was a driving force.On our next meeting,about an yr later,it occured to him that i had a gift and would be verry successful in life.Well I've not carved a niche as yet but still. :) .I hear that he's still treated with reverence and is earning his bread,butter and mutton, scaring the living daylight out of his bewildered clients by predicting weird movements of stars,but i know his imaginations infuse enterprise and determination into many a indolent individual.So let it be.Moral of story-don't leave it to the stars.haha


Enter destiny. Or fate.The canvas turns ghastly,diabolical even.You can only fuss..wriggle away to pure madness and still find no explanation.When you have no choice and things are thrust on you at random,life gets unbearable.but it still goes on..it appears as if you have ventured into a labyrinth or a whirlpool of endless agony and mental trauma..all u can think of is-just lay off coz u CAN'T HELP IT.And hope things get better.


Time for a small prelude.

Dil Chahta Hai-a pathbreaking film.Akash, Sameer n Sid.rocking!
I loved the unapologetic tone of the movie. The movie doesn't say what's right and what's wrong... it just tells things the way they are. Would you like to be the guy who's dad gives his fiancee's hand to another guy on the day of your marriage?Nope.Most respectable parents would react in a way similar to Sid's mom if they realize that their son is in love with a lonely divorcee who paints and spends time with her daughter when she is not into binge drinking. But hey,Sid had a choice to make in the movie.He did.Perhaps he made the right one.He didn't repent it....

It was my brother's wedding where i met her.Very intriguing,full of life;she was the very embodiment of beauty.The way she spoke,the way she sang..i mean everything about her was like,enchanting.There are some characters who are always conspicuous in a gathering.She certainly was one.Mesmerizing.I cant explain my feelings about her,cuz i myself didn't understand properly.I remember telling some close friends that i had a crush on her.Her very thought would bring a smile on my face cuz the memories which i could associate with her were all happy.which is rarely the case.d'uh, well, readers,it might appear that this' anything but cinematic influence. frankly,i don't give a damn.

Bro's voice is still ringing in my ears..'She's ill.The diagnosis is leukemia.It's quite late too.She'll be off to Mumbai soon.It's a 50-50 chance' he said.WHY?"it's all fate,brother"...this killed me,really!
probably i would never meet her again.But suddenly i feel an utmost desire to know how it would have been to be in love with her.Atleast to spend some time,know her better.CHOICE.would it have been worth it?Again,i don't know.i would never know probably.I'm being mad alright but by jove,she doesn't deserve this.


"look how beautiful Rupankar and Prachi are looking!" she kept repeating.

"I knowww!kotobar bolbe?how many more times?"
"are u in love?have u ever been in?"
"err...i think so.hehe"
"babbah...don't u still see?how comfortable and assured they look together;made for each other.totally in love.dekhchish? bhuto kothakar.u read shakespeare??"
"hyan olpo sholpo..keno go?"
"The sight of love , feedeth those in love...this comes naturally.ki bujhli?....."
I had smiled like an oaf.

All this might sound very dramatic..Again,i couldn't care less.Life for me is pretty much like that.period.The world is a stage.And i'm feeling all the more that i bring on the worst to people who are close.This IS agonizing.

also,the proverbial 'why her??' to which there's no answer.It's been long waiting for life to show a brighter side.Hope.And knowledge too.Of what i desire of this life.What will make me happy.complete.
but i know not how.great isn't it?
Inspite of myself,i'll urge everyone who comes across this post to post a plea to God-mercy!!that just might help.He might as well prove that He is.



Thursday, February 14, 2008

THE LIFEBOAT

Here,where the tense waves hang
It's domicile tons,we steer
Through rocking arch of eyes
And niggling reach of ear,
Anchored to the flying sky,
And chained to transforming fear

When shall we,all spent,
Row in to some far island,
And find, to our content,
The original strand
From which our ships once went
Though not the way we planned.

Us, on that happy day
This fierce wave shall release,
On our torrid face of dismay,
The final glaze of peace.
Our oars we all will lay down
And desires all will cease.